You’re not good enough. You’ll never do it. You’re a dreamer. You’re not getting any prettier. You could stand to lose a few pounds. You’re not the kind that succeeds. You’re too skinny. You’ll just keep failing like you always do. You make me so angry. Have you had enough of this?
Sticks and stones do far less cumulative damage, generally speaking, than words. The above line of declarations being decidedly deconstructive, they do make firm a general theme: someone is good for nothing. Whether it is true or not is immaterial, the recipient begins to believe. All the above statements have been pronounced over me, and I suppose over many of you dear readers. The words of influential people in our lives most certainly have an influence upon us, like it or not…believe it or not. The math checks out. So let us learn to put this knowledge to good use, to our advantage.
The science behind affirming ourselves is simply this: we give weight and consideration to everything spoken to us. Whatever washes over our brains has an effect; therefore we should be highly selective as to what we allow to wash over us, making sure we sparkle and not wither. The purpose of speaking to ourselves is to edify ourselves, to encourage ourselves in truth. If we do not know truth, then herein lies the first endeavor. Once we are persuaded of the truth, we can shamelessly affirm the truth over our very lives, bolstering our footing, expanding our circles of inspiration and influence.
Our lives are programmed, for good or for ill, most influentially during our first decade of life. Any destructive or fruitless programming accomplished during this early season will hinder us for the remainder of our lives, just as any positive programming will serve us forever. This is why ascertaining the truth is imperative, affirming the truth as it applies to us individually is liberating. Let us agree on two things.
The reprogramming of one’s headspace is a monumental task, made more difficult the longer we neglect to commence in earnest. It is a process of unlearning and re-learning, from darkness to light. In the second place, it is a task most assuredly worth beginning, for the obvious fruits it must necessarily produce. A record may only play according to the grooves placed upon it, whether sweet music or dissonant mental aggravation. We have an opportunity to smooth away the initial destructive grooves by the repetitive application of those desirable grooves.
“This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live.” [Deuteronomy 30:19] This verse encapsulates a reason why one might choose to practice the discipline of affirming herself as something that she heretofore has believed she was not. It is a form of the prophetic, calling that which is not yet as though it is already. In time, the reflection of the affirmation appears in the mind, then in the body. In due time, the reflection has become the word made flesh, no longer a reflection at all, but the substance of that which was once hoped for. Faith comes by hearing, so we should be sure to listen to ourselves and to others with longevity in mind.